Social Media and "The Rest of the Story..."

(photo credit: http://www.gosimplysocial.com)

We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.
2 Corinthians 4:8-10

Girlfriends, I just finished a morning perusal of my Facebook newsfeed. I have to share these reflections with you because I feel so strongly about this message. Some of you have sworn off social media for the very reason I am going to talk about: Seeing everyone else's perfect life makes you feel inadequate about your own life. I get it. I understand why you deleted the Facebook account or Instagram; however, I would like to offer a different solution. One that I think could revolutionize our lives rather than tear them down with attacks on self-esteem. I suggest we share the other side of our lives on social media...the dark side. Play Paul Harvey and tell "the rest of the story..."

So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:7-10

Social media. Facebook. Instagram. Twitter. Snapchat. What's App. 

Girlfriends, I love that we all post the fun and smiling pictures of our good times. I receive great joy from your joy. I laugh at your funny stories and jokes. Your children and grandchildren warm my heart. I feel connected to many of you that live so far away, or live close but busyness keeps us apart. 

Yet, ladies, very rarely does anyone post a picture of themselves or a loved one in pain, or injured, or crying, or depressed, or anxious, or struggling. I am her today to say: Do NOT let social media fool you! 
NO ONE has a perfect life! 
WE all HURT. 
WE all STRUGGLE with something. 

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
Romans 5:3-5

We like to put up brave fronts and hide the pain for many reasons, but the unintended consequence is that everyone thinks we have it all together. "Oh, her? Yeah, she has the best life. The perfect family. The dream job. She is always going somewhere fun. She doesn't know what it means to struggle. She must never work. She has so many friends. Everyone thinks she is great. Etc. Etc. Etc."

As a result, one begins to wonder and have doubts about her own life. 
STOP HIDING, my friends. 
BE REAL. 
Post the rest of the story sometimes. Speak your hardest truths. Bring it to the light, because you know what? It is freeing to be in the light. Darkness is draining and harmful. Satan lurks in the darkness, whispering lies to you that take a foothold in your mind and soul. 
YOU ARE NOT ALONE! 
Yes, our happy moments are what get us through the days most of the time, and it is great to share them. But let's be real, friends. Our lives are not all smiles, successes, and vacations. WE cry. WE fail. WE work and labor and struggle. WE lose. WE hurt.

I love that my oldest daughter is not afraid sometimes to share her pain openly. She did not ask for an incurable pain disorder in the entire left side of her body (CRPS or Complex Regional Pain Syndrome.) She is a victim. Yet even she often hides it, like we all do, because she doesn't want pity. She wants to be "normal" and treated normally, but reality is--she is not "normal" anymore. She has to find a new normal, and just when she finds it, life shifts again and "normal" blows away in the winds of change. It is NOT weakness to share your pain, to bring to light the demons that haunt you. Strength is in found in the prayers of the people of GOD, but we cannot pray for what we do not know about one another. 

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.
2 Corinthians 1:3-5

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. Romans 8:26-27

I challenge, you my friends, this week...this month...be REAL, be TRANSPARENT on your social media. Share your joys and good times, but turn on the light in the closet and share the struggles you have hanging there too. I would love to pray for you this week. And I boldly ask for prayer for my daughter, Joslyn, as she pushes forward in the "new mom" life, all the while battling the searing pain of CRPS in her body. Pray God will remove the pain from her body if it is within His will. We know He has the power, but we also trust in His greater plan that only He sees; therefore, please pray that God will empower her in every way to tend to her newborn, whatever His will may be. Pray she will hold on to every word in His Scripture, every promise He makes to use our experiences and trials on this earth for a greater glory in eternity.

He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
 Isaiah 40:29-31

Girlfriends, God is good. He already knows your pain. He gave you brothers and sisters in Christ to help you bear it, share it, and use it to encourage one another in Christ. Step out of the darkness into the light. Continue sharing your blessings and good times on social media, but do not be afraid to boldly state the pain and hardships so they may be covered in prayer. Ask God to guide you. And remember, you are loved through the good and the bad times, the beautiful and the ugly moments, and the highest or lowest points of your life journey. God is with you--everywhere!


 When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.
Isaiah 43:2

 He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.
Revelation 21:4

Expectations



As it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death.
Philippians 1:20

Good Morning, Girlfriends!

Did the sun rise on your day? I expect it did.
As a matter of fact, when I opened my eyes this morning, I expected the sun would be rising. I not only expected it because of the light filtering through my closed eyelids, but also because internally I just presume the sun will rise each morning that I wake.

Did you have your coffee or tea this morning? I expect you did.
As a matter of fact, when I went to the kitchen this morning, I expected the coffee maker would work and brew my drink. I not only expected it because I smelled my son-in-law’s cup of joe, but also because internally I just presume the Keurig will operate each time I need a pick-me-up.

Did you look at your computer today? I expect you did.
As a matter of fact, when I thought about writing a blog this morning, I expected my computer keyboard to light up. I not only expected it because I had barely put it away a few hours ago before bedtime, but also because internally I just presume my computer loves me and wants to function properly for me so I don’t yell at it.

Did you….did you…did you? I expect you did.
Why?
Because as a woman and human being, I…
Expect…
Assume…
Internally Presume…
Trust…
Believe.

But what if they computer crashed during the night?
What if they coffee make shorted out when turned on?
What if the sun did not rise and darkness prevailed?

Unmet Expectations.
False Assumptions.
External Reality Interfering with Internal Presumptions.
Uncertainty.
Doubt.
Disbelief.


The hope of the righteous brings joy, but the expectation of the wicked will perish.
Proverbs 10:28

Girlfriends, the reality is we all carry expectations whether we are aware of them or not.  Sometimes our expectations are grounded in experience of the world. For example, the sun rises every morning, sets at night, and rises again the next morning. We don’t consciously think about it, but we do expect it.

We all carry assumptions, grounded in reality or not. Most of the time, we can assume the coffeemaker will work because for the past however many months we’ve used it, coffee has come out every time. We don’t overthink it, but we do know that one day we will press that button and voila….nothing happens. But we never expect that day to be today.

We all presume certain things will happen as a result of our experience, assumptions, and knowledge of how the world works around us. I presume my computer will work because (1) I went to Mac and have never looked back, (2) my husband is obsessed with technology, and (3) I have a child-like faith that everything will operate the way it is supposed all of the time, despite my immature fits of anger when it doesn’t.

So, my friends, I assume about now you are saying to yourselves, “Jackie, get to the point!” Whether that is true or not, doesn’t really matter. I am still assuming it. And therein lies my point.

Ladies, we constantly make assumptions and have expectations that are often subconscious and ruled by our past experience, present state of mind, and the unique worldview we possess. Sometimes those expectations are met on a consistent basis, and all the world is at peace. Yet at other times, our assumptions run up against the expectations of others around us, and all hell breaks loose before we even realize what happened.  No one intended to hurt another’s feelings, because everyone presumed to be on the same page.

In reality, nothing in this life is promised to go as we expect or assume it will. Truthfully, we are told we will face trouble. (John 16:33) Expectations will not be met. Assumptions will make an “ass” out of “u” and “me.” (Thanks to my high school volleyball coach for first pointing that out to me.) And presuming leads to let-down, which in turn leads to all-consuming attempts at controlling what, in reality, only God holds in His hands: the future and the people around us.

Girlfriends, my message to you and to myself today comes from that same verse that promises us trouble in life: John 16:33.

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

TAKE HEART! Have PEACE. Jesus has overcome the world of expectations, assumptions, and presumptions with the only truth that we can truly and unequivocally trust and believe: He loves us, and He has final victory.

Victory over fear…
Over false or unmet expectations…
Over pain and suffering…
Over broken promises and shattered hearts….
Over death and dying….
Over every earthly concern you or I can imagine.
He experienced it. He fought the fight. He won the war.
And although the battle rages on inside our souls and between people on this earth,
you can raise your eyes to heaven in the morning, lift that cup of coffee to your lips, and confidently proclaim to the world (through your computer-aided social media) that JESUS REIGNS!

So consciously today make an effort to LET GO. Surrender. Lay it all at the feet of Jesus, the Lamb of God who came and conquered in a way the Jews never assumed would happen: SURRENDER! He did not build an Army and go to battle on earth against the Romans. No! He waved a white flag and laid down His life for you and me, and when God raised Him from the dead, He built the most powerful Army ever to fight the real battle…the spiritual one raging right now for our eternity.  Satan is using your expectations, your assumptions and your presumptions against you. Take back control with conscious prayer, proclaiming the Word of God you know to be holy and right. Do not live in a spirit of fear! Live in the Light of Christ….and have PEACE!

Girlfriends, today, His peace is with you….Expect it!  

No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him. They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign for ever and ever.
Revelation 22:3-5

Winds of Change

It’s autumn.
The winds of change are blowing.

Girlfriends, have you been outside this week? Have you gone on a walk, worked in the yard, or just sat soaking in the sun? If not, I encourage you to open the door and go. Soon enough, we will be huddled inside, clothed in layers, snuggling under blankets, and totally avoiding the outdoor world. 

It’s autumn.
The winds of change are blowing.

I just returned from a walk without music, headphones, or even my cell phone for that matter. (Pause. Overcome your shock that my iphone parted from my body for a few minutes. Continue reading.) The flags are whipping on their poles. Leaves of the trees are whooshing and whispering secrets only angels understand. The gusts were blowing my hair all over my head, only to die down and leave my face hidden behind all the wild strands. I consciously breathed deeply and exhaled slowly, savoring the fresh fall air, sharing thoughts with God, and sensing the seasonal transition breaking through time.

It’s autumn.
The winds of change are blowing.

With every step around the neighborhood (carefully counted on my FitBit of course!), I felt God moving me away from a cherished past and toward an exciting, yet still unknown, future. Have you ever experienced God’s stirring in your body? Sometimes when I walk, I am forcing myself forward against the wind, wondering why I am even trying, or what is the point? At other times, the air is calm and still, and I don’t think at all. But today was different. The wind was at my back, and I almost felt like I was gliding over the newly blacktopped roads of our subdivision (which in reality would have been a good thing because now my shoes have black tar on the bottoms!) Today, the winds of change were blowing, propelling me in a different life direction, almost as if the wind and I were one, united in purpose and meaning. I sit here now, thinking, “ With whom did I really walk today? Was that whistling truly just the wind?”


It’s autumn.
The winds of change are blowing.

Girlfriends, I do not know where you are today, right now, in your life’s journey. Maybe you are fighting headstrong into hurricane force gales, holding on for dear life, wondering if you will make it through another minute, hour, or day? Perhaps you are caught up in the spiral of a tornado, spinning and screaming for someone to let you out? Maybe you are in a still, serene place with no wind at all, just savoring the peace and calm? Possible you are not relishing the calm, because you see a foreboding sky and wonder when the storm will start and how long will it last? Or maybe, like me, you have the winds of change at your back, forcing you onward whether you like it or not? Maybe, like Mary Poppins, you are “on the wind” with your umbrella at this very moment, about to land in a purposeful place that is desperately in need of your gifts and talents. 

Whatever your circumstances, my friends, one thing I know
for certain is that the Force behind every gust, breeze, or calm is our Father in Heaven, Who both created and controls the winds of our lives. I pray today that you put your hope and your trust in that invisible force, in that God you may not “see,” but Who, just like the wind, is present even when your eyes cannot perceive. Our Lord directs the winds of change for His purpose and His plan, and Girlfriends, you can fight it, or you can flow with it. You have a choice. I pray this week, take a walk with the Lord. Pray. Sense His presence. Ask His forgiveness. Receive it and be blessed. Feel His peace. And one day, you will enter His rest. Until then, enjoy every season of this life and glorify His Name.

It’s autumn.
The winds of change are blowing.

Gotta Give It To God


Hello Girlfriends!!
So long....so very long since I have written a blog posting. I know. Forgive me?
Since I went back to school to study for a masters degree, the pace of life increased tremendously--as if I were not already living on a speeding train bound for endless track ahead!

Much has transpired in the ensuing months, and I promise I will blog on some of it soon. I have a two week break from class right now, and I am trying to catch my breath (and decorate my special space called my "office.")

In the meantime, I want to share a little ditty (funny word!) that I started writing in the hotel last May as we waited to move from Virginia back to Chicagoland. Finding it in my unpacked pile, I polished it up today thinking how very appropriate the lyrics are for this day!

NOW...who can put it to music?????? (Obviously not this girlfriend right here!)

Prayers, Hugs, and Love to All of You!

Gotta Give It To God

I wanna live
I wanna dream
I wanna be that
Girl I seem

There’s so much I gotta do
It’s hard just walkin’ in these shoes
Feeling so overwhelmed, it’s true,
Just can’t stop singin’ these blues

I know I gotta…

(Chorus)

I gotta, gotta, gotta
            Gotta give it to GOD
I gotta, gotta, gotta
            Gotta give it to GOD
            Give it to GOD
            Give it to GOD.

One day I’m up,
Next day I’m down,
In this crazy head
Life’s turned around.

If I wanna live
If I wanna dream
I know I gotta go
To that Living Stream

I know I gotta…

(Chorus)

I gotta, gotta, gotta
            Gotta give it to GOD
I gotta, gotta, gotta
            Gotta give it to GOD

            Give it to GOD
            Give it to GOD.

Who Am I?

Image from : http://joshmcewan.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/443017297_640.jpg


“I’m coming back to the heart of worship, and it’s all about You, it’s all about You, Jesus. I’m sorry, Lord, for the thing I’ve made it when it’s all about You,
It’s all about You, Jesus.”
-Heart of Worship, sung by Matt Redman

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.
2 Corinthians 5:17

As I prepared for church this morning, the song Heart of Worship came on the radio. I literally just mentioned this song to my daughter last night as we face-timed, talking about her Catalyst Leadership Conference last week with her church. The conference theme was Leading From Who You Are: Identity, Calling, Legacy.  She relayed a story to me about one of the worship singers, Phil Wickham, who is injured and cannot talk, let alone sing. He wrote a letter to the attendees explaining how this time of silence left him thinking about his identity as a singer and his worth without a voice. I referred her to this song, Heart of Worship, because the point the lyrics make is that Jesus is the heart of our worship first and foremost. Our voices, our words, our notes, our melodies, our harmonies—none of those are the heart of our worship. Without them, our worship of Jesus does not stop, and if it does, then we have identified the wrong things as the heart of our worship. 

The identity portion of the conference struck a chord in my daughter that has been plucked over and over and over since her accident nearly three years ago.  When an event happens in this life that completely alters who you think you are, what you are able to do, and how others perceive you, what do you do? Where do you turn? How do you begin to redefine yourself according to the “new normal”? From whom do draw guidance and strength?

The world says these answers will vary depending upon who “you” are, but what God’s Word relays to us is that the answer is no different from beginning to event to post-event to the end: Your identity is found in the Lord, in Jesus Christ. You were, are, and ever-will-be a redeemed and beloved child of God regardless of who you think your are, what you can or cannot do, or who others perceive or claim you are.  You must come back to the heart of worship every single day and let Jesus be the One to remind you of who you are in Him. You are more precious than silver or gold. You are more important than the flowers in the field or the birds in the sky. You are worth dying for…and He did.

So why do we keep searching? I am not just talking about our unsaved friends who have not heard, or have failed to recognize, who they are in Christ, but I am also referring to every single professed Christian who has intentionally given their life to Christ, including me. Why do we make everything except Christ the heart of our worship? Why do we think that our great ideas, our hard labor, our efforts, our abilities, and our achievements are the basis of our identity?

My daughter’s conference topic somehow “mysteriously” coincided with the message from our pastor at Gateway Church today regarding identity. Jesus is my foundation and anchor. All that I am, all that I do, and all that I want others to know of me is rooted in Christ who strengthens and guides me daily. And when I bring myself back to this point of reality, the rest of my thoughts, my feelings, my actions, and my subconscious activity come in line with God’s plan and purpose. Then I am at the heart of worship in every circumstance because Jesus lives in me and I abide in Him. My identity is so closely bound to Him that all joy, all struggle and pain, even the mundane, cannot change my identity.  Fear, sorrow, agony, and sadness may scratch my surface but they cannot penetrate nor alter my core.  I won’t give up because He did not give up on me.

I read this blog to my son, and he told me I was not talking in real enough terms for him and “normal people” to understand. So I asked myself, what does identity in Christ look like in real life here on earth? For me, I can say God wants me to know this: I am loved when I feel like no one around me cares or notices I exist. I am a daughter when my parents are far away.  I am a sister to more than one. I am still valued and needed when my children are grown and living on their own.  I am worthy and respected even when I get it wrong or make mistakes. I am MVP of dusting and cleaning. I have citizenship in heaven no matter which state I reside in. I am a Pulitzer Prize winner with every journal or blog entry. I am funny when no one laughs.  I am perfectly designed and built just right to host the Holy Spirit within “my temple.”  I am a light in dark places. I am more beautiful than a Hawaiian sunset.  I am strong in my weakest moments. I can love the unlovable and forgive the unforgivable because I am loved and forgiven. I am a leader and a follower. I am a part of the whole and wholly a part.  I am heard among a thousand screaming voices drowning out my own.  I am a work in progress but progressing according to a grand design.

My friends, I do not know every aspect of your identity in Christ, but I believe we are not so very different. God engineers your circumstances and environment to make you uniquely His child, but His promises are universally applicable to you and to me. My prayer for you this week is that you will take some time in solitude to consider your identity. Write down all the names/titles you have been called or call yourself, and then take them away. Who are you now when all of those identifiers are gone? Examine each one in the light of Christ and the Word. Learn who God says you are to Him. Share some here if you wish.  You may or may not like who you are in this world, but I promise you will LOVE who you are in Christ eternally.

Because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.

Romans 10:9