I Do Not Know

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
   neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD.

 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
   so are my ways higher than your ways
   and my thoughts than your thoughts. 

Isaiah 55:8-9

Someone At The Door

Aloha, Girlfriends! No, I am not in Hawaii, just dreaming! 

Earlier this week, I did take a short trip and spent the night at my mom's house. As I was sitting in her office typing my blog to you, the doorbell rang. Mom was in the shower, so I answered the door. Two women carrying Bible bags stood smiling at me and began praising Mom's landscaping. From that praise, they prompted me with a question about the anger hanging in the air lately around our cities and whether I knew the cause. I answered them with God's word, stating that He does tell us that our battle is not against flesh and blood, but against the spiritual forces of evil (Ephesians 6:12). After a slight pause, one lady asked if she could share with me an article addressing this issue, and she handed me the Watchtower magazine. 

Now, I had no interest in the Watchtower or the message of the Jehovah's Witnesses. I warmly accepted her hand-out but informed her that I am a Christian. They nodded, asked about my church, and then the other woman said something that later came back to play over and over in my mind. 

"What I love about the Jehovah's Witnesses is that my mother grew up under Hitler in Nazi Germany. When she came to the US with so many questions, their Bible answered every single question for her. Then she passed it on to me." 

Hmmmm, really? EVERYTHING? She read the Jehovah's Witnesses bible and suddenly knew everything and had no more questions? (By the way, their bible is called the New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures. The men who "translated" it had little or no knowledge of either Greek or Hebrew.) Sorry, not buying that line. But we will come back to that in a minute.

To make the story short, I seized the opportunity of having two women at my mom's door to witness to them. I asked the first woman if she had a pen, which she did, and a piece of paper, which she opened up in a notebook. I took the pen and notebook from her and wrote "www.girlfriendmoments.blogspot.com" and told her that, since she shared with me, I would like to also share with her. I let her know that I write a Christian blog for women. I also mentioned that I agreed with her that God should be the source of our knowledge, not Google, not your neighbor, not necessarily even your pastor. 

For we are told in Jeremiah 29:12-14, "Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity." 

I highly doubt they will ever read my blog, but I am grateful God gave me the opportunity to cross paths with them that day. For one, perhaps God planted a seed of change that will bring them to the Truth. But more importantly, because the second woman's comments spoke to my heart about an issue that was already dwelling there. 

Seek and Find Me

The blog I was writing that day the doorbell rang was called The Story. (You can read it in the archives on the leftside of my page if you missed it.) The Story is God's Story, the Bible (correctly translated Hebrew/Greek to English), rearranged in chronological order. If you remember, I told you that Emily, Jordan, and I are reading this Bible out loud together. What I did not tell you is how arduously slow this reading is going! I am sure this is no surprise for those of you who know my son very well. "Deep thinker" does not even begin to describe Jordan! 

Remember that three year old phase when you were convinced that the only word your child knew was "Why"? Yeah, well, I don't think my son ever outgrew that stage. Therein lies the blessing and the curse! Inquisitive, reflective, and analytical, Jordan rarely accepts anything for its surface value. (Wonder where he got that gene?) Hence, reading aloud to him has always been a long process requiring a enormous block of time. Now, we all know that I am a mom with nothing else to do all day, so naturally I am delighted by my little investigator. (Yes, that is sarcasm.)

Seriously, though, reading the Bible challenges me to introspection. Reading the Bible with Jordan stretches me further, traversing topics that demand observation, reflection, explanation, and interpretation. When I presume to know the answer to his question, I explain to him, only to find myself on a walk later wondering if I actually gave the correct information. I find myself returning to the Bible, seeking and pursuing the truth in a way I can share with my children. Funny thing about seeking, I always find something. Many times, one question leads me to another and the pursuit of answer reveals an entirely new yet related certainty; hence, as God tells us you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.(Jer 29 above)

I Do Not Know 

But what about the times when I seek and I cannot find the answer? When I knock and the door is not opened? Is it acceptable for me to tell my children, "I do not know?" Does not having every answer crumble my faith and demote God to a lesser being, or negate His existence at all? Is that not the argument atheists and other non-believers, by the power of Satan, want to use against us? And what about supposed believers, like the Jehovah's Witnesses who visited me? She told me that her religion and her Bible have all the answers. I have a problem with both kinds of thinking.

As stated in today's key verse, God tells us (His) thoughts are not (our) thoughts, neither are (our) ways (His) ways. Actually, His ways higher than (our) ways and (His) thoughts than (our) thoughts. Seeking and finding Him does not mean we become like God, that we know all His answers. Instead, we find our way into His abiding love that reveals knowledge and wisdom according to His measure.

I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. Ephesians 1:17

I am quite frankly comfortable with that thought. After all, was that not Eve and Adam's problem in the Garden, wanting to be like God, to have all that knowledge from the tree? Look what a disaster that turned out to be for all of humanity! I want God to be God, and humans to be humans. I do not desire to know all that He knows for many reasons, but really for one major point. 

I have found that when I think I know everything there is to know about a subject, or even a major portion of it, I stop pursuing. I am no longer consumed with the desire to learn more or to spend time on the topic. I move on to something else interesting. Let me ask, have you ever had that experience? Perhaps the subject was academic in nature, but what about people? Yes, people, created in God's image. How many spouses stop pursuing one another once they have been together a long time, once they have achieved great familiarity, once they "know everything" about each other? Can you imagine if that were the case with our Lord and Savior?

I do not know everything about God, and I cannot completely answer many of my own or my son's questions about His revealed Word. Yet, these deficiencies do not impede my faith, instead they embolden it. I love the Lord. I believe in Him and who He says He is. I am encouraged by the fruit generated by His Presence in my family. I have witnessed His faithfulness and constantly observe the results of His promises. Consequently, I hunger and thirst for Him like a craving that is never satisfied. I want to know Him more and more. I yearn to spend time with God, in conversation and relationship, listening as He reveals to me little by little the Truth that increases my freedom and my faith incrementally. The more He unveils, the greater my desire to turn to His Word daily, for courage, insight, and direction. 

So, I continue to read aloud with my kids from the Bible. They continue to ask questions. I pray and then I answer. Often we stand in the kitchen until midnight, going back and forth in deliberation. Sometimes my answer is a plain, "I do not know," but you can bet my faith says, "But God knows, and I trust Him." I hope my kids do too! 

To have faith is to be sure of the things we hope for, to be certain of the things we cannot see. Hebrews 11:1

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to Him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. Proverbs 3:5-7

My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you peace and prosperity. Proverbs 3:1-2